SINGLE OF THE WEEK

Westlife: Better Man

This is the 2nd single to be released from Westlife’s 11th album and the 2nd in a row to be written for them by Ed Sheeran. I can’t believe Ed Sheeran has managed to write 2 songs in a row that a: were for Westlife, b: sound like what Westlife 2.0 should sonically sound like in their self-proclaimed plan to evolve their sound and c: didn’t want me to gouge my ear canals out of the sides of my face.

“Better Man” actually sounds nothing like their previous hit and former number 1 on Tim’s Top 20/iTunes, “Hello My Love”. In fact it sounds like a subtly-improved version of their sit-on-a-stool-until-the-key-change output. Not that anything needed improving.

What “Better Man” does, is remind listeners of the Westlife they were before Brian pissed off. Westlife probably needed to do the cover album phase and the manband albums of the early 10s to shake things up before taking the timely break of 6 years. Because it helps makes this new song sound completely fresh and much more wanted than maybe it would have been, had they not branched out the way they did in the autumn of their first stint

By the way, the orchestra version is actully better than the original mix. Both versions, though, are worth plenty of listens!

VERDICT: Shane and co. have smashed it out the park! 8/10.

Jax Jones & Martin Solveig Present Europa: All Day And Night

2 production Powerhouses, in the form of Jax Jones and Martin Solveig have come together to form a superduo of sorts. If the first single from Europa is anything to go by, their name is perfect as the song is about as close to the sound of European Y2K clubland as is possible.

There are whiffs of “Gypsy Woman”, peak-Faithless and every major Euro trance smash of the late 90s/early 00s, while singer Madison Beer has a tone reminiscent of Norwegian singer/songwriter Ina Wroldsen, who conveniently had a massive hit with one half of Europa (Jones), on the former number 1 on Tim’s Top 10, back in January 2018, on “Breathe”.

The sound is certainly more akin to that of Jones’ solo output but, Solveig’s influence in the four-to-the-floor rhythm section creates a welcome marriage.

If 2019 is the new 1999 then Europa should be the faces of the music scene for the next 9 months at least.

VERDICT: Smash!!!! (and grab it right now) 8/10

Zara Larsson: Don’t Worry Bout Me

The Swedish sensation returned to the charts late last year with the slow-burning hit “Ruin My Life” which, in typical Swedish style, married a happy sound with a melancholic lyric.

This time round, Larsson has gone for a 90s-esque vibe, not dissimilar to Europa’s new track. The difference is, this song is pretty forgettable and, not even Larsson’s powerful vocal liven this up to the point I want to listen to it again.

For a follow-up to a song which didn’t set the charts alight outside of her homeland, I think Zara Larsson is treading on thin ice this time round.

VERDICT: Pretty gash (and no I’m not being vulgar about her vagina, I’m a gay man, I think all vaginas are vulgar!) 3/10

Kelly Clarkson: Broken & Beautiful (from the movie UGLYDOLLS)

Some more bright, punchy pop from the American Idol. “Heat” is still riding high on Tim’s Top 20. This follow-up, Clarkson’s first brand new release for nearly 2 years, is likely to overtake it soon. While the quality of the output certainly isn’t broken, this perfect combination of major-key pop perfection, Kelly’s unreal vocals and backing vocals only fit for divas and Westlife (who also have left Simon Cowell during their career) makes the new single from the upcoming kids movie “UGLYDOLLS” very beautiful indeed.

VERDICT: Smash! A beautiful, bangy smashy smash! 8/10

P!nk: Hustle

I’m not going to lie and say I’ve always been a P!nk fan. Following the release of “Funhouse” in 2008, with the exception of “Blow Me” in 2012, she really ground my gears for ages. I can’t put my finger on why. The only thing I can think is she went a bit too MOR/Adele that the material became sleep-inducing for me.

2017 was a bit of a turning point for my opinion on Pink…only a bit though. The Eminem duet “Revenge” was pretty good.

For me, seeing her shit rings round the competition at the 2019 Brit Awards was what made me take notice properly. “Walk Me Home”, which is currently on its 6th week in Tim’s Top 20, was intriguing with its wtf time signatures and countraaaay twang so I was all ears for the follow-up.

“Hustle” will be part of Pink’s new album “Hurts 2 B Human” and doesn’t completely disappoint. It’s the kind of uptempo Pink I loved to listen to during the I’m Not Dead period…BUT, it sadly lacks the punch those 2006 classics had. Its status should have remained as an album filler and, although fun, it’s kinda throwaway for the standard I know Pink is capable of.

VERDICT: A mish-mash of smashy gash…(sort of, erm, like y’know, like whatever, this single is out now. So what?) 4/10

Ciara: Thinkin Bout You

When this song came on in the car for the first time, I was ever-so excited. It sounded like the sort of thing Carly Rae Jepsen used to release before she went a bit drab. On the single cover, she looks like Janet Jackson, dressed in a catsuit from the Girls Aloud videoshoot for “Sexy! No No No”, about to play with herself.

It’s got a happy clappy 4/4 beat which is all very nice, the chord progression is so 90s pop I want to go to Flares and have a dance to some Samantha Mumba. Then the melody just goes absolutely nowhere and the best part of the vocals are the autotuned bits.

I don’t want to write this one off altogether. I’ll eat my metaphorical hat if “Thinkin Bout You” does ANYTHING on any official chart anywhere. As a follow-up to the hot and sticky “Level Up”, if that couldn’t light the world up to the Ciara comeback, this certainly won’t. But, it’s nice…

…It’s nice.

VERDICT: It’s….nice 6/10

That’s all for this week!